Tag: self-reflection

life: giving thanks

2016 has been a shitty year. Personally, politically, it’s been an all-around mess. So when I think of giving thanks, I have to think a little harder to find the joy I’ve been missing… whether they’ve been subsumed by loss, pain, or stress, the good times have been there, I just need to shine a light on them.

After mulling it over for a few days, I realized I’m grateful for:

  1. Surviving what could’ve been a tragic car wreck with little more than a ruined car and a few scratches.
  2. The briefest of vacations with the boy, but a vacation nonetheless.
  3. Two healthy, well-adjusted cats. After a few hiccups, they’re getting along and experiencing no more poopy drama.
  4. Minimalism. Because it’s made me appreciate what I have, what I can afford, and what I can live without.
  5. YouTube! A silly one, but I started making videos as a way to force myself to use my camera and learn some Premiere basics. Now, I’m hooked and it’s my preferred form of “reality” entertainment. Plus, I’ve learned so much.

There’s so much more, but I will reserve those for my year-end recap. In the meantime, have a happy holiday!

inner poise, or something like it

I had my first mid-year review on Monday and I’ve been thinking about one of the comments that my supervisor made. She said, “You’re so calm, sometimes it’s easy to forget that you’re just as busy as the rest of us.” It’s not the first time someone tells me I’m calm, or that I have a soothing personality. One of my coworkers says I have a relaxing presence, that my aura gives off good vibes. I’ve heard all this before, and I guess it’s true. I appear calm, but inside my mind is going a mile a minute, thinking thinking thinking and trying to make sense of it all. I appear calm because I often remind myself that there’s no sense in getting worked up and making things unpleasant for those around me. I also do a lot of writing and walking. Both of these are exercises and self-reflection and allow me to take a moment to disconnect and expend all that restless energy that I keep inside. There’s probably a study out there on introverts and how we function, but all I know is what I feel. That sense of inner poise isn’t always reflected in my writing… I think this blog makes me sound more harried than otherwise, but that’s exactly why it helps… it’s an outlet for all the little things that make me tick, cringe, and groan.

I will now go channel my inner Bridget Jones.