on love languages and Valentine’s Day
My love languages are time and touch, my partner’s are gifts and service, all this to say that Valentine’s Day (and birthdays, Christmas, anniversaries) is always an interesting time. This year, I’m deep into my low buy, and gifts are one area that I’m working on. I don’t want to engage in hyperconsumerism, and I know that we both have more than enough, so I’ve been focusing on experiences.
He’s been meeting me halfway. This year’s surprise was a luxury dining experience (which was lovely and not a little intimidating). However, as a gift person, he can’t help but gift an object in addition to the experience. I appreciate every gift, even as I stifle the thrifty girl in me who can’t help but cringe at the expense. It’s the challenge of having different values when it comes to objects and money–it’s not always easy, but after 16 years, I’ve learned to accept and appreciate (and only cringe a little). Relationships are hard. They take work. Understanding where he’s coming from (and how my own history colors my view on gifts) has helped as I try to balance living with less and appreciating the gifts that come into my life.
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Note to longtime readers: In case you missed the last year’s update, I changed my name to Emilia Grace on most of my socials to align with my penname.
marginalia and such 