social distance diaries: days 190-196

in which we cut our own hair

Day 190, Monday

I’ve been using Notion to plan my weeks, as an addendum to my planner, and it’s making the start of my week so much more predictable and effective. It’s nice to be able to mark tasks off and brainstorm all in one place; it’s really helping me find a new groove now that my committees are starting up again.

Day 191, Tuesday

Grocery time! I never got around to doing a proper grocery trip in August for numerous reasons, but then I sprained my ankle and I COULDN’T go to the store until now. Living off Amazon Fresh orders is fine and dandy, but the variety isn’t the best, and their adherence to sell-by dates is often questionable. It was so nice to buy fresh produce again.

Also, took my first real walk since the sprain and it was a challenge. This is going to be a slow recovery.

Day 192, Wednesday

In an effort to rebuild my strength (and get out of a physical rut), I started an old workout program that I followed a few years ago. I won’t name them here because I don’t agree with their approach to diet, but the exercise plan is easy enough to adapt for my current needs and is helping me feel a bit less bleh. My ankle has more mobility, but my gait is still stiff. I need all the strengthening I can get if I’m ever going to get back to running, let alone walking more than a short distance.

Day 193, Thursday

One of those marathon meeting days. Not the first this week, but the longest… Also, announced my intention to continue to work remotely for the Spring semester. I miss my office, but I’m also not willing to take the chance when the offer is available. I’ve dealt with enough health struggles to risk it and I refuse to give in to the capitalist mentality that tells us to sacrifice our personal well-being for the sake of a company or institution. mic drop

Day 194, Friday

I’ll be working this weekend, so I most of the day off in exchange (had a meeting I couldn’t miss). It felt GLORIOUS to lay in bed for an extra hour, and take my time over coffee and a nostalgic Toaster Strudel breakfast (saw two random strudels on my socials and had to satisfy the craving). It’s also been incredibly productive. Sometimes, a day off during the week results in more getting done than a three-day weekend.

Day 195, Saturday

Working backup on the chat desk, so I blocked my morning off to get stuff done and spent the 6-hour session reading on craft, watching tutorials and writing advice on YouTube, and taking care of tasks in the background. I dislike weekend chat (I have reasons) but I committed to making the best of it.

Day 196, Sunday

Made vegan French Toast to use up the “just” eggs bottle that the boy bought (he was curious). Anyone who tells you that it tastes “just” like eggs has not had an egg in a very long time… it feels like rubbery eggs and tastes weirdly of steamed broccoli (that’s the only way I can describe the way it smells and tastes). It’s not bad but it also needs a lot of dressing up so it doesn’t taste weird. Lots of cinnamon helps.

Felt a hormonal migraine coming on, so I took two advil and… fell asleep. I don’t think it will keep it away, but maybe it will keep it from ramping into a full blown volcano of pain.

And then we reached the “cut my own ends” stage of “I’m not fool enough to go to the salon” times. It went well.

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#projectuseitup: quarantine empties 3

a whole lot of empties

Quarantine empties, part 3! or, what I used up between July and September

EltaMD UV Physical SPF 41 – This used to be my favorite physical sunscreen, until I noticed that it started to dry out my skin. I came back to it this year when I was struggling to find a non-makeup based spf for daily wear… that may have been a mistake. The dryness returned and I think this may be one of the culprits behind my eye dryness/sensitivity. Will not repurchase.

Thayer’s Witch Hazel, Rose Petal – A travel size from last year’s Whole Foods beauty bag. My favorite is the cucumber, but the rose is ok. I dislike rose scents in general, but I dislike waste more, so I poured this in a spray bottle and used it like a face mist. I have one more to use up (from this year’s bag and hope they replace it with a different scent in future bags).

Andalou Naturals, Meyer Lemon C Creamy Cleanser – Not my favorite, but not the worst. I won’t repurchase, but it met the need for a cream cleanser when I couldn’t find my ACURE cleanser.

LaRoche-Posay, Toleriane Hydrating Gentle Cleanser – I really liked this but couldn’t find a replacement when I ran out, so I’m going back to the CeraVe hydrating cleanser, which is similar but not as soothing IMO.

Dr. Bronner’s Almond Pure-Castile Soap – an old standard. I use this to make a foaming hand wash and as a travel all-over wash (when travel was a thing that actually happened).

Vitafusion Melatonin gummies – Basically can’t sleep without these. They’re the only type of melatonin that does not leave me groggy the next morning.

Farmacy Cheer Up brightening eye cream – I picked this up soon after it released and the texture was lovely, but it does NOT like the Florida heat because it went from mousse to weird gloopy gel long before the 6 month use by date. Also, 6 months is too short for such a large jar. They need to find better packaging to stop this product from going off so quickly.

Bath & Body Works, Vanilla Coconut & Fashionably Latte antibacterial gel – When covid was starting to become a real thing, I took a last minute, random trip to BBW and stocked up right before they ran out. When antibacterial disappeared from all stores, I still had a nice stock of these.

Andalou Naturals, CannaCell Happy Day Cream – My favorite day cream. Tried it as a sample and bought the full size because it worked so well on my skin. Not too oily and just a little dewy.

Arnica Montana 200ck tabs – do these work? is it a placebo? I don’t know, but it’s worth a shot when all else fails.

Twinkle * Apothecary Orange Blossom perfume – One of Twinkle’s monthly scents, a perfect blend of orange blossom and vanilla that gives me nostalgic, Cuban baby perfume vibes.

2 random pens!!!! – always a success 🙂

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social distance diaries: days 183-189

the one where things get weird

Day 183, Monday

Straight to the vet at 8am. I couldn’t sleep and know a migraine is starting as a result, but my anxiety was way too high and the weather is too variable at the moment.

Kitty is ok and received another shot of steroids to help with her inflamation, but I hate the thought of her having to take steroids for the foreseeable future. I hope this is a seasonal thing that resolve… I’ve tried everything, but can’t determine what the irritant might be. Having so many issues with scents and chemicals myself, my home is generally free of common irritants. All I can think is that there might be mold? It started after my other cat died and a part of me also wonders if she reacted to the cleaning that she received.

Anyhow, what I do know is that going to the vet when I can barely walk and it’s raining is a BAD combination. I ass-planted when I stepped on a slick walk and now my right side is bruised and achy. Luckily, I didn’t hit my head and I fell on the cushiony part of my side, so it’s just a bruised bum.

Day 184, Tuesday

For reasons I had to bring two of my mom’s cats to my place for the day. One was generally grumpy and the other mildly concerned… returning them to their carriers was an ORDEAL and resulted in my BF lifting the couch while I hobble-chased with a towel.

Day 185, Wednesday

I’m really feeling Monday’s fall and the cat toting of the last two days (they chonky). My back is not pleased, but my ankle is getting back to normal.

Anywho, got my flu shot and had a followup with the cardiologist and ortho. My heart is fine, just a “sinus tachycardia” caused by stimulation (probably hormones or diet). Nothing to worry about at least. I’m glad I have a cause, because I’m tired of people telling me to a) relax or b) that I need to breathe. FFS I practice yoga on a regular basis and have low blood pressure, I’m already too relaxed.

Ankle is healing as well. I should be able to start taking short walks soon without the brace. I’ve been making good use of my exercise bands to strengthen the ligament.

Day 186, Thursday

Started getting a migraine. Meetings are even worse when your head is pounding and you just want to sleep.

Day 187, Friday

Quick morning writing session and the draft is just about done…

Day 188, Saturday

YES! The rewrite/dev edit is complete! It feels like such a triumph after all the everything that’s been happening. There were times when I doubted that I would ever have the energy to write again, but slow and steady brought me back to this. I’m going to take the rest of the month to read up on craft, plan my next round of edits, and work on some practice query materials.

Day 189, Sunday

And like that, I learned that at least one of the terrible sounds coming through my wall is the sound of my neighbor’s punching bag. GAH.
They’re not the worst neighbors I’ve ever had, but they have no sense of what it means to live in an apartment or an old building where every thump resonates through the wall. I usually ignore it, but my SHELVES were shaking and all my frames were rattling. I sent a text letting them know, even though I hate making contact. (again, I’ve had REALLY bad neighbors)
By the sound, I suspected a kickboxing workout. Nope. Just a home gym setup in a too tiny apartment with a shared wall. 😦 I skip workouts that involve jumps just to avoid being that neighbor. No such awareness on their part.
Things are being slammed even as I write this.

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social distance diaries: days 176-182

in which time loses all meaning

Day 176, Monday

Another Monday, another day inside despite it being Labor Day… not that I ever really do much on Labor Day. I’m not a beach person, even under normal circumstances.

Day 177, Tuesday

I’ve been turned around all day, thinking it was Monday. My leg woke me up at 2am and kept me up until 4-something, so there’s that. I applied heat today to see if that soothes the muscle. I think my ankle has started to tense, leading to cramping (at least, I hope it’s just cramping).

Day 178, Wednesday

Cookie Cat went back to the vet for what is (hopefully) the last time. His stitches came out and we asked for him to be tested for anything contagious because, yes, I’m bringing him home. Part of me isn’t ready for a second cat—I’m still missing my sugar bear and little girl is still not 100% since her bout of bronchitis (and other -itises)—but I want to give him a chance at a nice, comfortable, indoor life. Basically, my place is a rehab home for my mom’s sick ferals.

Day 179, Thursday

Trying KT tape on the ankle because the boot is making my leg ache. Also adding some stretches and mobility exercises to loosen up my joint. The scabby knee is itchy AF.

Days 180 – 182, Friday – Sunday

TBH, these days were a blur. Friday was filled with meetings and the weekend was filled with writing, podcast recording on Sunday, and worrying on Sunday night. It was a productive time until kitty started sneezing and breathing faster than normal. Her asthma/allergy is acting up again and I have no idea what is causing it, but a vet trip is in order.

The number of confirmed covid cases is going down in the state and locally, but we’re still higher than we were when we shut down back in March. I’m worried about the holidays and kids going back to the classroom 😦

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social distance diaries: days 169-175

in which I am in injured…

Day 169, Monday

Kitty woke me up too early, so I decided to get to work right away… missed my morning walk, decided on a post-lunch stroll and bam tripped on a massive pothole behind my building, twisting my ankle 😦

An officer was driving by and saw me fall. It was pure serendipity because I’m not sure how I was going to hobble back to my apartment without something to lean on.

Glad it wasn’t a break, but not feeling great about being injured, alone, and unable to get much help from my family because of covid. Not being able to reach my mom or boyfriend for well over 30 minutes while crying and stumbling around my apartment with a swollen ankle and a bloody knee brought a lot of my living alone fears to the fore.

Day 170, Tuesday

Living that peg-leg life. Wasn’t able to sleep with the boot, but at least the pain decreased and managed to get some rest after switching to a brace. Being a chronic painer means I’m well-equipped to deal with the situation. sort of sigh Slathering on arnica, triflora, and cbd cream between icing sessions. Elevating all day with my WFH setup. It makes for some interesting zoom sessions.

The knee that I scraped is badly bruised, but my knee feels fine (thank goodness!). Not an attractive sight.

Called the city to report the pothole. I can see it from my bedroom window… hoping they fill it.

Day 171, Wednesday & Day 172, Thursday

Apparently, my body doesn’t like naproxen. Two days of dizziness, drowsiness, brain fog, and near inability to function. The side effects of the meds were worse than the sprain.

Day 173, Friday

24 hours after my last pain killer and I feel significantly better. Switched to advil as needed, which isn’t often. As long as I’m wearing the boot, icing, and taking care to rest, I don’t feel pain. The bruising is well and truly purple now.

Getting my head back helps.

Day 174, Saturday

I stayed up reading, something I haven’t done in a VERY long time, which means kitty was most displeased when I didn’t get up for her breakfast. I received a nip on my arm for my disrespect.

Still having a hard time finding my focus. Edited for about 25 minutes before my attention was shot.

Spent some time with the boy, which always makes me a little nervous (he has to physically go to work twice a week and goes shopping more than I ever do), but he wears his mask and I really need the help if I want to leave the house.

Day 175, Sunday

Back to writing (focus on point today), but there’s so much that needs doing, I have to split my time, even on the weekends. Plus, my leg feels uncomfortable if I sit too long—not that standing is any better. I mostly have to lay, which has me feeling all manner of dejected after 6 days straight.

Started working on a cookbook review project, but I’m limited by mobility and ingredients at the moment, so this is going to be interesting…

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off the shelf: what I read – August 2020

Still Reading

The Forgotten Beasts of Eld by Patricia A. McKillip – making my way through those print TBRs…

Finished

Act Like It by Lucy Parker – (link to HB podcast) A perfect enemies-to-lovers romance! I heard about this book a long, long time ago and had it on my book list forever… When Heaving Bosoms recapped it on one of their episodes, I decided the time was now. This was the unexpected reading highlight of a slow, but good reading month.

Unmarriageable by Soniah Kamal – Pride and Prejudice in Pakistan… I’ve long felt that the only way to pull off a beat-for-beat Pride & Prejudice update is to set it in a place where marrying above your station can make a meaningful difference in a woman’s life. Setting it in Pakistan in the year 2000 is chef’s kiss. You get the mother-obsessed-with-marriage without it being weird and out of place. Billionaire boyfriend books aside, the relationship between Alysba and Darsee reads like a real Pride & Prejudice set in “modern” times. Loved how the story was updated and all the references to books scattered throughout (I already ordered a copy of Sunlight on a Broken Column by Attia Hossain).

One random aside, there are some jarring head-hopping scenes where the narrative shifts from the speaker to an omniscient narrator that tells you a different character’s thoughts or backstory. I’m not sure if this is a call-back to Austen, or a writerly conceit that didn’t work for me.

The Virgin and the Rogue by Sophie Jordan – aphrodisiac gone awry… This is the sort of premise that sounds absolutely bonkers but makes for a very fun, quick read. Couldn’t put it down. I loved the chemistry between the characters and look forward to reading more Sophie Jordan.

West by Edith Pattou – this book has been on my shelf for a little over a year… it was published in 2018, the sequel to Pattou’s East (a retelling of “East of the Sun, West of the Moon” that I love). One of the mainsubplots is a pandemic.
facepalm

That said, it took me back to a world I missed and reminded me why I love re-tellings. Still, if you can’t handle the thought of a plague, maybe hold off on this one.

A Heart of Blood and Ashes by Milla Vane – barbarian romantic fantasy … this straddles the place between erotic and romantic fantasy IMO. If you don’t like female anatomical bits described as c*nt, maybe skip this one. This book is doing things… it doesn’t all work for me, but it makes me think, and that’s always worth the read.

Audiobooks

Pleasure of a Dark Prince by Kresley Cole – Not my favorite, but it’s a turning point in the series so…
Unpopular opinion: the Valkyries are the beings I enjoy the least in this series and this one has A LOT of Valkyries. Much of the conflict was of the “this could’ve been fixed if you talked about it” variety; pretty standard, but didn’t fully for work me. Think Jewel of the Nile with a not-quite-unrequited love interest, a god that needs to be killed, and a whole of lot interpersonal baggage.

TW: lots of sexual abuse and torture (the big bad is a really BIG BAD).

DNF

none! yay!

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social distance diaries, days 162-168

in which my sense of time only gets worse…

Day 162, Monday

First day of the term, still working remotely. Attended the virtual resource fair as a rep for the library, but it was really too early in the term to host a virtual event IMO. It’s not the same as a pop-up event on campus, where serendipity lures them in (and freebies).

One student showed up for my “table,” with 10 or so showing up for the event as a whole (based on my count).

Day 163, Tuesday

Back to the vet for scheduled surgery. I’m going to call the kitty Cookie Cat, so he has a moniker in these posts. Vet called after the surgery to say the growth may be a tumor rather than the hardened pus pocket he expected to find. Hoping it’s not a sarcoma. My feelings have been pretty tender since I lost my cat in May.

We’ll have to wait and see. If it grows back, we’ll talk next steps. Praying it doesn’t.

Day 164, Wednesday

Cookie Cat was cheerier than expected. The wound is bigger than I expected, but makes sense given the vet’s findings. I hate seeing him in pain, but he has such a sweet temperament. He’s back at my mom’s house to recover.

Watching the hurricane forecast and sending lots of love to the folks in Texas and Louisiana.

Day 165, Thursday

Been frustrated lately by the level of “service” that I’ve been semi-compelled to commit to this year. One of my colleagues tried to volunteer me for another committee and I had to nip that in the bud right quick. On my annual assignment, I have service listed at 20%, but it’s more like 25-30% of my time, if I tally the hours spent in meetings. Then there’s the administrative side of my job and all the meetings attached to that. It’s frustrating because I have a small department and a lot of pressure gets placed on whoever is available when the rest of us are in meetings. Long, complicated story. It’s an uneven level of expectation for my unit because of inter-campus politics.

Day 166, Friday

Woke up early, but feel extra run down… Took a walk before settling in for work, but a migraine is threatening to start (massive storm clouds looming, sinus pressure building). Trying all my interventions…

One of those days where too many people tried to turn their problems into mine… not going to happen.

spoiler – my interventions worked

Day 167, Saturday

My sense of time is a mess… Woke up slightly earlier than I have during the last few months, and suddenly it felt like I had hours to get stuff done. Thought it was lunch time at 10 am and it only got more confusing from there. Still, managed to get a lot of stuff done.

Released the bird I rescued last month. Its mother was hit by a car and its wing was injured, but a few weeks in my mom’s care too care of that and it flew straight into the sky.

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Rescue bird 🐦 graduated to free bird 😊

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Day 168, Sunday

Tired after yesterday’s day of high energy. It’s to be expected. My energy has peaks and valleys.

Recorded a life update… now, to find the will to edit it.

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social distance diaries: days 155-161

in which we miss a storm and do too much

Day 155, Monday

A Monday like any other. I wasn’t ready to get back to work after my short break and it took some time to find a groove. A lot happened while I was gone (just two days and shit hit the fan), so it was a matter of sorting through the backlog in order to catch up.

Day 156, Tuesday

An unexpected return to the vet for a follow-up no one mentioned… A weird encounter while waiting to pick up the kitty that involved a woman who refused to pay her vet bill after leaving him in the office for 10 days and then proceeded to open the carrier in the parking lot… on the edge of a main road. Cat got out, chase ensued. Luckily, her cat went into the bushes and wasn’t as skittish about being handled as mine because my heart was in my throat the whole time.

Lots of meetings in between drop-off and pick-up and a bit of emotional turmoil throughout. It was a difficult day, but I’m glad we’re almost done with vet visits for this one (minor surgery next week).

Day 157, Wednesday

Trying to recover from yesterday’s upheaval. I settled in and managed to catch up on projects, meetings, and cleaning my inbox (which was completely unmanageable). My mind hasn’t been clear enough to focus on creative writing, but I’m on target to meet my goal for the month if I can push through the weekend fingers crossed.

Paid bills after dinner, which is an event of late. Since I’ve started managing my mom’s orders and payments, it’s been hard to keep track of my budget using my account. I’ve resorted to a manual list of purchases to sort between her stuff and mine. The total always gives me a shock, but I have to remind myself that I’m managing bills for two homes and ordering stuff I would normally buy in person with cash, so it’s not breaking my budget, but highlighting our spending habits (and all the vet bills I’ve been charging to my card).

Day 158, Thursday

So much happening as we prepare for the term to start on Monday AND we have a will-it-come-our-way tropical storm/maybe hurricane situation on the rise. Long, tired sigh. If it does, I’ll have to pack up and head back to my mom’s with a cat that hates being picked up and REALLY hates her crate. Ordered delivery for lunch because I couldn’t handle the thought of dishes.

Day 159, Friday

After an Instacart fiasco wherein the groceries I ordered for my mom ended up at someone else’s house (felt really bad for the shopper, but there was no way to communicate the error for a number of reasons)… I packed myself off to the grocery store at 7am to avoid other shoppers and get out before things got busy.

A long day. Didn’t get enough sleep. Caught up on work stuff to make up for my slow start.

Day 160, Saturday

No hurricane watch (for now)! One of the local meteorologists recently called it “selfish, but good news” when he reported that the forecast track had shifted far enough to keep South Florida out of the storm’s path. It does feel selfish, but I’m glad I didn’t have to deal with the mess of another trip to my mom’s with my cat… plus the fear and anxiety that comes with every threat.

Day 161, Sunday

Another sleepless night. Got up to feed the cat and went back to bed. I hate sleeping in, because it feels like I miss most of the day, but I was desperate for sleep. Didn’t do much good though. Got up to a cat litter box incident (hoping it was bad aim and not another urinary issue–she literally just finished a round of antibiotics), impromptu cleaning session ensued. Sigh.

Didn’t meet my writing goal for the week, but I’m still likely to hit my goal for the month.

Podcast (recording) time in the afternoon. Reading time until bed.

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social distance diaries: days 148-154

in which I commit to self-care

Day 148, Monday

Back to prepping for the start of term, though it feels like the summer lull is never going to end. Not complaining about the lull, just the weird limbo that comes with not being able to work on the sorts of projects I normally complete during the summer (usually physical reviews of the library collections and planning for events… neither of these is happening any time soon). Research is at a 0 because who cares at this point? Not a great feeling.

It’s too hot to think. Finished the scene I started editing on Sunday, but focus was tough.

Day 149, Tuesday

Back to the vet run… follow-up for injured cat and dental cleaning for feline sister.

Day 150, Wednesday

So feline sister had to stay overnight on Tuesday, so my day started with yet another trip to the vet. I have now been to the vet more times in the last three months than I have in the last three years. And there’s at least one more trip to go for the injured cat, as his abscess has dried into a hardened thing. He’s on antibiotics to see if it clears up, but will likely need a mass removal. sigh.

Spent the rest of the day catching up on the projects I started on Monday. Pretty productive, actually.

Day 151, Thursday

I’m taking two days off. Last week’s day off became a vet day, and the week before was full of anxiety because of the storm… I’ve realized that work and home life have blurred into each other, and weekends are not always the relaxing, barrier-resetting events I’d like them to be, so I cleared my calendar for two days of writing, reading, resting, and not scheduling other people’s needs into my day.

Briefly had to break that last goal because my mom’s smoke alarm started blaring for a new battery and she couldn’t reach it because of the bursitis in her shoulder. Luckily, I had the right batteries at home and the drive was quick. Tomorrow, I’m not dealing with anyone else until I finish my writing sprints for the day.

Day 152, Friday

Success! No drama! (mostly. There was some work drama, but I got is secondhand via two of my sources. Not getting involved. I don’t get paid enough to fight this fight.)

Caught up on my writing goal for the week 🙂

Day 153, Saturday

Had my first run of the week. Legs are starting to feel stronger, but my heart was struggling. I don’t run with the heart monitor because it’s massive and I’m scared to break it (there’s a $1500 you-break-it-you-bought-it fee), but my heart rate goes pretty high according to my fitbit. Still building my stamina.

More writing. It’s been a good weekend. Hoping to maintain this momentum.

Day 154, Sunday

My grandmother turned 89 earlier this week. I don’t know if she really recognizes me anymore, and then there’s the mask, so… but I wanted to commemorate her birthday in some way, regardless of her awareness of birthdays. I’ve been buying her toys and things to keep her hands busy for the last few years, but she’s been fisting her hands a lot lately and bruising herself on hard toys. Found some soft, slo-rise squishies that fit in the palm of her hand and took them over today. I haven’t been out in weeks, beyond those trips to the vet (all cats and cards exchanged outside), so I went inside for a little bit (masked and keeping my distance, of course). She seemed to enjoy the squishies. Seeing her decline has been rough. It’s gotten worse since quarantine; she’s getting so little stimulation at home, but at least she’s safe at home.

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social distance diaries: days 141-147

in which we reach the cleaning frenzy stage of quarantine…

Day 141, Monday

So glad to be back home, but still tired despite getting a full night’s rest. Two days of sleeping on my mom’s couch with three of her colony cats to keep me company means I’m still catching up on lost sleep and dealing with a crick in my neck.

A slow start to my week and another return to the vet, though this time for a planned visit rather than another emergency.

Day 142, Tuesday

Slightly more rested today, so I managed to catch up on some of the project’s I abandoned during last week’s storm prep. Work writing, but no novel writing because the energy isn’t quite there.

Ordered some pizza for dinner with what I hope was vegan cheese (I really couldn’t tell and part of me suspects it wasn’t). My tummy will tell… Cheese aside, had a really weird moment where some random lady “literally” got up in my face before I could dodge out of her way—mask hanging from her ear and all. My anxiety could’ve done without a stranger invading my social distance bubble. In brief, it was a small pizza place, I was standing to the side, blocking the soda fridge so I wouldn’t block the register. Woman walked in, didn’t pause or give me a chance to shift before walking straight at me (it was three steps from the door to the fridge at most). I twisted away, but it was still too close for comfort on a day when the state reported more than 7000 covid cases. Not pleased.

Pizza was good though.

Day 143, Wednesday

Much more productive today. Managed to get started on several projects between meetings and chat. I’m not mentally prepared for the start of Fall, if I’m being completely honest. I’m so grateful that I’ll be able to continue working remotely (and that’s a privilege I don’t take lightly).

Randomly, decided to sweep on some eye shadow. It was unexpectedly invigorating after nearly 5 months of 0/minimal makeup.

Day 144, Thursday

Just tired today. Kitty’s random cough/sneeze turned into a series of cough/sneeze attacks that concern me, so off to the vet tomorrow.

Day 145, Friday

Kitty has to stay at the vet because they had too many appointments and she needs to be sedated to be treated (she vicious). My mind has been drifting all day and not having her around has me anxious.

On an ever-in-the-back-of-my-mind sidenote… I live in a tiny, privately owned apartment building that is attached to two commercial spaces (all under the same property owner). There’s been a lot of discussion about rent and evictions and everything that is happening in the world… I’m not in that situation, but I am constantly worried about the possibility that a) my landlords won’t be able to pay their property taxes (because 1 office and 1 apartment are currently empty, and they haven’t been able to keep their business going) or b) they die (because hello, hotspot). It’s a very real fear that rears it’s head at the worst moments and my “worst case scenario” personality has been spinning circles. I don’t feel sorry for my landlords — they definitely have more options than I do, but the possibility that they default on their taxes makes me nervous and definitely makes me feel sorry for me.

Sigh. Just praying for some good neighbors.

kitty had to spend the night at the vet’s because they were so swamped with cases(!). She’s so small, they just needed one xray (tiny nugget!)

Day 146, Saturday

Kitty came back home. She hasn’t sneezed or coughed since her treatment started, but we’re waiting on a radiologist’s report to see if anything is going on in her lungs. I’m hoping it’s a run-of-the-mill infection and not asthma or anything chronic.

Spent most of the day in a funk. Low energy and not much desire to get things done. I hate feeling this way, but it happens.

Day 147. Sunday

Started writing again, but it’s a VERY slow start. I don’t have the energy to focus and the mood I’m in isn’t helping. I don’t think August will be as productive as July. It’s also increasingly hot, which makes me feel lethargic.

To feel some sense of accomplishment, I organized the storage in my closet. Having one closet means that EVERYTHING gets stored in there and, while I don’t have that much stuff, it piles up when there’s only one shelf.

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