social distance diaries: days 338-344

Day 338, Monday

Covid test and breakfast with the boy. First time I’ve sat outside a restaurant, but it was empty and no one was walking by so I felt ok about it.

Day 339, Tuesday

Got our results! Both of us were negative. And, this is sappy, but because we were both negative, I felt safe kissing my boyfriend for the first time in almost a year. It’s been a difficult time for us both.
Meetings… workout, started tidying in between meetings and lunch.

Day 340, Wednesday

Went on a jog for the first time in FOREVER! Since the day I sprained my ankle.
Filed mom’s taxes! Wohoo! One thing scratched from my to-do list!
Tidied around my desk because it was a disaster of random documents.

Day 341, Thursday

We’re getting more mixed messages about returning to campus. I’m trying to remain proactive and establish a plan before things advance, but it’s hard to wrap my head around the demoralizing reason behind this sudden push and the uncertainty surrounding an increase in the number of students in the future. Why bother protecting faculty for nearly a year only to create a super spreader event in the Fall (maybe Summer)? I’m not the only one who feels this way.

Day 342-344 Friday – Saturday – Sunday

WriteOnCon and Virtual Writing Retreat with the Heart Breathings sprint group. I debated not revising until Monday, but then I started and found the sprints incredibly motivating. I did some decluttering to clear my space and my head, and some laundry to get it out of the way. I have a lot of mixed feelings about returning to the office, but I’m not going to worry about that for a few days. Back to the DMV on Monday. That’s my most pressing concern. I’ll start transitioning back to the office and hope for the best in a couple of weeks. It’s a very complicated situation. I can’t be compelled to return until May, but I have my own reasons for wanting to slowly transition back rather than deal with an abrupt return. So many anxieties surround the possibility of contagion and the awful circulation in my office. I’m grateful for the relative safety I’ve had while WFH-ing, but this is a rush job and no one is happy about the reasoning behind it or the message we’ve been given.

What should I call these updates when I go back to work? Stuck in an office diaries? πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ

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social distance diaries: day 21

Day 21, Sunday

Slept in until 8, which is later than usual for me but much needed. Still have a mild headache that may be weather-related (I hope). Tried to write, but it’s been hard to concentrate for obvious reasons. My anxiety is manageable today and no heart palpitations so far (good!). I’m mostly drained after the emotional roller-coaster of the last two days.

Took a very short walk, simply to get out of the house for a few minutes. Watched PS. I Still Love You and it was as perfect as the first.

Migraine still going strong this evening, but it’s mild by my standard. Hoping it starts to rain soon and that it’s just barometric-pressure related.

I have to pick up my mom’s Rx refills tomorrow and I’m dreading the thought of going. The pharmacy doesn’t have a drive thru or delivery option and she has so many scripts, it’s too much of a hassle to have them transferred. Going to pick up whatever she, my BF, and I might need and hope I don’t have to go out again. Pray for me.

 

social distance diaries: days 8-10

*this has been a WEEK

Day 8

5:30 am – Really tired this morning and barely want to get out of bed. Had an anxiety attack at 1 am and another at 3 am that left me reeling. I think I slept for about 4 hours, definitely no enough.
breakfast toast, biscotti, and two cups of coffee (I’m running low on biscotti)

7:30 am – check email and plan out my schedule for the week

8 am – back on chat

9ish – manager type stuff… signing forms electronically because no printer.

[neighbor always has a loud cough, but now it sounds particularly dire]

11-12p social distance chat with work friends

lunch and test zoom with BF who is semi working remote

1pm very awkward work meeting with all faculty and staff…

[took a nap because the tiredness was too much, came back to a million emails – the curse of remote work]

3:30+ emails, surveys, answering questions, scheduling meetings

β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”

Day 9

woke up ok, soon entered crisis mode after learning my gran was injured and headed to the hospital. My fear for my family’s health is now code red.

8-10 – did my job as planned to stay busy and keep my mind occupied. chatted for an hour with one of my coworkers who was very kind. chatted with BF to feel a connection. Waited for calls from mom and updates.

I am going through all the stages of grief.

the rest of the day was a wash of meetings and anxiety. Good news, my gran had no fractures, albeit lots of bruises, and was sent home to recover.

β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”

Day 10

one of my coworkers traded for my morning hours, so I decided to take the morning mostly off, check email, and forget about everything for a while. Finished the day with the usual work stuff, but I felt much better.

Things that have been helping: l-theanine for my anxiety, walks, checking with the boy on google hangouts. lots of calls with mom.

Also, reading a heck of a lot of romance, but that’s unchanged since the world became a trash fire in 2016. Let’s just say, my choice of reading material is a reflection of my inability to focus on much of anything. HEAs forever! At least in fiction.