It’s been one of my darker weeks. I don’t often talk about my less-than-chipper days, but I have them and they usually turn into day*s*. I try not to linger on the doubts, but there are times when I’m prone to melancholy (sounds so much more refined than depression); it makes me wonder why I bother doing any of the things I do. Why should I write? Why should I even bother? Wouldn’t I be happier, freer, more at ease if I just let go and enjoyed the moment without driving myself to sit at a computer, pounding away at keys, knowing there’s a very good chance it will amount to nothing in the end? I try not to feel this way, but some days I let it happen and let go. I haven’t written in days; I tell myself it’s because I’m stuck, that the scene is not right, that I need to step back and do some plotting, but I know it’s because I don’t have the energy to be bothered. I’m tired, physically and mentally. I’ve been disappointed, and have let that disappointment color my outlook. Some days, I just want to let my thoughts go and think about nothing. I know this feeling will pass, and I will come back to the page, ready to start over, but it’s hard to look beyond the next day, let alone the next week, and see something good come of it.
It’s Sunday, so I will share a few of the things that have made me smile this weekend, and hope that better days are on their way.
It’s been a rainy, overcast day. Just the sort of day for staying indoors and enjoying some alone time while rearranging the living room (because…).
After 2 years, I finally upgraded from side chairs to a sofa! I went with a grey Klippan; it’s comfy and just the right for two (+1 demanding kitty). My home once again smells like Ikea–wood and vanilla candles (it’s a scent I will always associate with moving in to this place).
I bought pink washi tape while couch shopping, so today I posted up some instagram prints that had been sitting in a box for over a year. It’s held up for a few hours, will see if the humidity doesn’t win out and make the tape lose its hold.